One opportunity the COVID-19 pandemic has granted me is a heightened urgency to for deep reflection. I deliberately find time and space to introspect on life and work in a more meaningful manner.
Out of this introspection, the word ‘resilience’ has consistently popped up. I took this as a sign to codify how my resilience look like for me. Resilience is a measure of how much I want something and how much I am willing, and able, to overcome obstacles to get to it.
Psychology Today describes it this way: “Resilience is that ineffable quality that allows some people to be knocked down by life and come back stronger than ever. Rather than letting failure overcome them and drain their resolve, they find a way to rise from the ashes.”
There is also the dimension of psychological resilience: “The ability to mentally or emotionally cope with a crisis or to return to pre-crisis status quickly. Resilience exists when the person uses mental processes and behavior in promoting personal assets and protecting self from the potential negative effects of stressors.”
Admittedly, I wasn’t able to quickly return to pre-COVID levels as quickly as I desired. Worry and stress had compromised my psychological strength. With a depressed market, work was hard to come by. Most clients took a wait-and-see approach and didn’t invest as much in coaching, consulting or training. These three are the mainstay of our business model.
Persistence and resilience only come from having been given the chance to work though difficult problems.” – Gever Tulley
As I struggled with this reality, a question came to mind. “What if my clients are going through the same dilemma as I am?” Instantly, I realized that a different thinking was required. Just like glitchy computer software, my mind needed an urgent ‘upgrade’.
The six pieces of ‘software code’ were perspective, self-control, thoughtful mindfulness, determination, community and wellness.
1. Perspective
Creating a compelling picture in my mind is the first step to resilience. This inspired me to design a mission I want to wake up to every day. It is important because my present stand shapes or determines the future I want. I must keep my eye on the goal lest at the end, I lose everything.
“Old men sit in the shade because they planted trees many years before.” – Ugandan Proverb
Q. Where or what have you set your sights on?
2. Self-control
How do I remain composed in crisis, difficulty or uncertainty? It is not just brute strength or a hope for the best. My composure comes from a deep respect for values that I have set for life and work. My perception must be supported by strong pillars. A dream without action yields no fruit. I must bring my body and mind under control to deliver what I set to do.
“A roaring lion does not catch any prey.” – Acholi proverb
Q. Which roadblocks consistently sabotage your self-control?
3. Thoughtful mindfulness
Logical reasoning that brings awareness and helps define action required for desired outcome. I must create thinking time every day. This time must be totally uninterrupted by digital devices. Early mornings tend to work well before my family wakes up. Other times is during my cycling time. The better I think, the more clarity I find for life and work. It helps me to never foolishly go beyond the limits I can handle. It keeps me on track.
“If while climbing a tree you insist on going beyond the top, the earth will be waiting for you.” – African Proverb
Q. How do you approach opportunities or barriers you face?
4. Determination and grit
Tenacity to remain on mission despite competing or conflicting stimuli is hard work! To keep myself on track, I consistently ask myself: “How was I on mission today?” This seemingly simple question has deeper repercussions. My key performance indicator is how I live my mission every day. If I haven’t co-created a possibility with anyone, I am out of mission! Something must be done differently the following day to get me back on mission. My confidence isn’t threatened by other people’s performance because I know that I have their own special talent.
“The dog does not worry when the chicken runs over to the bones.” – African proverb
Q. What causes you to lose your determination (habits, thoughts, environment)?
5. Community engagement
Meaningful relationships that foster collaboration, team-work and amplified growth are treasured now more than ever. Isolation has amplified my need to pro-actively evaluate and nurture present and new relationships. My time is invested where I can serve better or in action that leads towards impact. With teamwork and cooperation, we extend our boundaries and can become bigger than ourselves.
“When Spiderwebs Unite They Can Tie Up a Lion.” – Ethiopian Proverb
Q. What future are you creating for yourself, your team, family/community?
6. Wellness
Finally, finding mental, physical and spiritual health to support the whole being is critical. I think, the older I get, the more aware I am of how these three realms are interconnected. Before, I could just get by with a ‘silo’ approach to each realm. However, I am now acutely aware how intricately my mental health affects my physical health. Or how limited sleep has adverse effects on my meditation. I have found cycling to be a sweet spot where all three converge. When I don’t take care of one realm, the other two ultimately suffer.
“A man with a cough cannot conceal himself.” – Yoruba proverb
Q. What do you do [or don’t do] everyday to ensure wholesome wellness?
Photo by David Clode on Unsplash
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