Posted on Thursday, February 26, 2015

Could Privileged Kids Miss Out On Character?

Today’s guest post comes from Joanie B. Connell, Ph.D. She is a talent management expert and career coach for people across job levels, ages, and industries. She works with companies to attract, develop, and retain top talent and she works with individuals to improve their success and happiness in their careers. Learn more about Joanie and her new book, Flying without a Helicopter online.

Character building seems to have taken off more easily at the schools for underprivileged children than at schools for privileged kids. It has been more appealing to students who have a real fear of not finishing college, since it offers them a tangible solution they can embrace: work hard, work through challenges, be strong, have strong principles, and you will succeed.

Privileged students, on the other hand, do not fear dropping out of college; they take it as a “given” that they will get into college and complete it because everyone in their family does this. The privileged children and parents don’t seem to be worried about the increases in emotional problems, burnout, and suicide among affluent children.

Posted on Tuesday, February 24, 2015

3 Big Lessons From [Not] Keeping Time

The morning started off like a heavy fog. My mind, eyes and body felt distinctly apart of each other. Deep in my mind, I knew something was required of me. But what was it? I struggled to make sense of the chaos in my mind.

Then the phone rang. My wife’s phone. From my wife’s side of the conversation, I deduced the inquiry was about me. Like lightning flashes in a thunderstorm, my memory came to life. I should have been in a meeting. And it was already fifteen minutes into the meeting!

In a flash I was out of the door. I felt awful. I had let down a group of great men with whom I was to meet. Forty-five minutes late, I entered the meeting room my head hung low in shame. I had let myself down as I had them too.

Posted on Tuesday, February 17, 2015

Sometimes It Takes A Crawl To Win

It was gripping as it was inspiring. On all fours and her chin she crawled to win. Deep inside her, she knew she had to finish. Why? She had conditioned her mind to fight to the end. Quitting was not an option.

As 29-year-old Hyvon Ng’etich pushed through the pain barrier, I was in tears. The determination written on her face was beyond description. Yet she crawled herself to a third position finish! Her courage and determination won the hearts of many. The Austin Marathon race director even adjusted her prize money to reflect a second-place finish.

We are all faced with different marathons in life. Career, family, business, education… the list is endless. We may struggle away and then hit a wall. Our situation may seem bleak or untenable. Self-doubt kicks in and we are ready to throw in the towel and sacrifice our win.

Posted on Friday, January 30, 2015

Why To Be Simple Is To Be Free

At the center of human existence is a craving for freedom. Wars have been fought to preserve freedom. Men and women have shed blood to the point of death. Our desire is to live to our fullest potential. We will go to great lengths to become prosperous. Freedom is sweet and highly valued.

Why, then, does it become so difficult for us to define our goals? The same goals that will usher us into that freedom we so jealously crave? It is because this process will be incomplete without you taking full responsibility for those goals. I have experienced many instances where a mystic fog of terminology and semantics shrouds goal-setting. Decoding the terms and definitions is daunting.

This discouraged me from setting my personal goals. If an organization would spend copious amounts of time, funds and personnel to design their goals, how would I even dream of getting mine done?

Posted on Friday, January 2, 2015

2 Simple Ways to Save Your Marriage from Drifting Apart

This is a guest post I wrote on Jackie Bledsoe’s blog. You can connect with Jackie on his blog, Twitter, and Facebook.

I can hear the melodious voice of Louis Armstrong reverberate in my mind. It transports me to another realm altogether. As it blends with my heart beat, I begin to smile. A smile that ushers in another soul into mine. My beloved wife… [FULL POST]

photo credit: Ed Yourdon via photopin cc

Posted on Thursday, November 27, 2014

No, It’s Never Too Late To Lead!

A few months ago, an article in the local daily outlined a growing concern. There is a perceivable drop in the quality of graduates (from high school to college). And their level of preparedness for the job market is increasingly wanting.

As I pondered this, my thoughts immediately moved to how this affected society. How a seemingly innocuous process so violently affects the very existence of society. And, may I propose, how that process has had a massive impact on leadership.

This isn’t surprising at all. According to the World Economic Forum’s Outlook on the Global Agenda 2015, a staggering 86% of respondents think that there is a leadership crisis in the world today. I believe that the ‘stickiest’ leadership acumen develops in two institutions; the home and school.

It is here that we all were first socialized. We received our life’s blue-print, culture and way of thinking. Where installation of our basic operating system occurs. That platform colors our present and in turn determines our legacy to a large degree.

I drew two observations from the newspaper article mentioned above.

Posted on Monday, November 24, 2014

Leadership Embraces Invitation

It was the end of a ten-week parenting coaching that my wife and I are involved in. I was busy preparing for my talk for the final-day retreat when our seven-year old son came to me and asked, “Daddy, when you are done, could you come and play football with me?”

The immediate answer on my mind was, “Son, I am busy preparing for this parenting retreat. Could we play another day?” Instantly, I felt that my RSVP was brash and totally unwarranted.

I turned to him and said, “Son, let’s go kick some ball!” I accepted his invitation and play we did for about 20 minutes. Then I took some little extra time and taught him a new ball dribbling skill.

Posted on Monday, November 17, 2014

Constantly Improve Your Position

The Acumen East Africa Fellows Program is a one-year, fully-funded leadership development program that gives 20 individuals from across East Africa the training they need to accelerate their social impact and leadership potential.

It was a long written application process followed by an intense telephone interview. Before I could exhale, it was time to plunge into a fast-flowing river. There was a promise of breath-taking vistas, rapids and the possibility of my kayak capsizing.

But I still launched off. And what a rush it was! This was the Acumen Fellows Selection Program for 2015. Intense, nerve-wracking and phenomenal it was. All the participants had to prepare a one-minute elevator pitch. And to make sure that we completely understood the instructions, there was ’60 seconds’ added within brackets.

There I was ready to launch my pitch. Just to make sure that I wasn’t going to flounder, I had written it out and committed the main points to memory. Thirty seconds to my pitch, everything changed in my mind. It was not a conscious thought process. It is as if something took over my thinking. My pitch vaporized into a fine mist.

Posted on Monday, November 10, 2014

What You Can’t See Will Hurt You

It was a sunny morning out in the yard. I was a boy doing what boys my age were fond of. Tinkering with my toys and tools. Then out of nowhere, a loud thud startled me out of my adventure. Heart pounding, I looked around for the offending culprit.

There it lay! Twitching, bleeding and feathery warm. A pigeon had flown into the window of our Volkswagen Kombi van window. I picked it up hoping that the bird was just stunned. After a few more twitches, it went limp. And I was sad.

This tragedy could have been avoided if it had only flown five inches higher. The pigeon could see, but it lacked the knowledge of the foreign obstacle. Just because it didn’t see the glass didn’t mean that there was a clear flight path.

Posted on Friday, November 7, 2014

My ‘Big-5’ Vision Killers

We all have music to play, a song to sing, or a play to star in. You want to be remarkable. Maybe you dream of the day you will become a guru or respected authority in your field. Then the doubt strikes. What’s wrong with me? Why can’t I reach my aspirations? And the questions pile on thick and fast!

You are not alone. Every day, I struggle with moments of self-doubt. Wondering if my dreams are valid in the first place. And it stems from my past. In ‘You Have Permission To Visualize’, I mentioned that you don’t need permission from anyone to decide what your vision is.

However, that same key can leave you paralyzed. This is because casting your vision carries with it a huge responsibility. It requires you to respond to challenging questions in regard to the planning for and execution of that vision. Hard work looms. And you can beat up yourself because of your doubt, fears and sometimes, overconfidence.